Did you know that over a third of Americans in relationships aren’t satisfied with their sex lives?
At school, we learn a lot of things about sex; why we do it, how to stay safe while doing it, and how to put a condom on a cucumber. But, there’s a lot that’s unfortunately left out of sex education, including how to know when your sex life is satisfactory and what to do when it’s not.
Unlike what you were told when you were younger, sex isn’t a scary, dangerous activity that’s sole purpose is to make millions and billions of babies. Sex is also about pleasure, and it can improve your relationships, your mental health, and your overall wellbeing.
So, get to grips with your sexual satisfaction in this guide and improve your quality of life.
What is Sexual Satisfaction?
The definition of sexual satisfaction is going to be different for everyone, but there are some basics that can be met across the board. A sex life that you enjoy and feel comfortable with is a good foundation, whether you’re in a relationship or not. If things feel a little one-sided when it comes to pleasure, something needs to change.
There’s also the regularity of sex. To feel fully satisfied, you should be having sex as often as you want to. This changes for people, and where one person may want sex with their partner every day, another could happily go weeks without any action under the sheets; it’s all normal.
Finally, there’s the fulfilment of sexual desires. Everyone has desires, and if you can achieve them in your relationship you’re definitely on the right track! Sexual satisfaction, here we come (pun not intended).
Ask yourself, do you feel there’s anything missing or not quite hitting the spot when it comes to your sex life? If yes, you need to have a rethink about your satisfaction. It really is as simple as that.
Why is Sexual Satisfaction Important?
Aside from reproductive matters, there are a whole bunch of reasons why sexual satisfaction is important! Did you know, for example, that good sex could actually be making you healthier?
Because it’s a form of light exercise, regular sex can help lower your blood pressure, strengthen your muscles, improve the health of your heart, and burn calories. One study also found that frequent sex (one to two times a week) had more immunoglobulin A in their saliva, which indicates a better immune system and a stronger defence against disease. Other health benefits of sexual satisfaction include:
- Better sleep
- Relief from headaches and migraines
- Helping to unblock sinuses
It’s not just your physical health that can benefit, either! You can also create more trusting, intimate relationships, and even feel more loving towards your partner. It can also improve people’s perception and understanding of emotions, which is pretty amazing.
Your mental health could benefit, too. If you’re achieving sexual satisfaction, you could see an overall increase in your mental stability, wellbeing, and happiness. Good sex is a big confidence booster, too!
The Factors That Affect Sexual Satisfaction
According to the World Health Organization, there are a number of factors that affect sexual satisfaction, under the umbrella of sexual health (which includes STIs, sexual violence, and harmful practices). These can’t always be controlled, unfortunately, and are particularly prevalent in the developing world. Factors include a lack of education, lack of access to sexual health care, and not living in an environment that promotes the importance of sexual health.
If none of those is an issue for you, it could be something else that’s causing your sexual dissatisfaction. A lot of times mental trauma can affect how you feel under the sheets, and seeing a therapist could help. If your partner’s doing everything right and you’re still not loving it, this could be a route to take.
If you experience pain during sex, you should always see a doctor. Not only will this affect your satisfaction but it could also be a sign of an underlying condition.
It could also be the case that there’s miscommunication in the bedroom, you’re not entirely comfortable with your partner, or they’re not confident enough for you. Hormonal changes can also affect sex drives, so if you or your partner are going through menopause or are on hormonal birth control, don’t factor those out!
How to Improve Your Sex Life
Achieving sexual satisfaction is all down to what’s wrong in the first place. If the sex isn’t long enough, look into how to increase sex stamina. If you’re bored of your sex life, look at ways you can make it more fun with toys and role play. If you don’t enjoy sex, look at other methods of arousal and pleasure, such as clitoral stimulation for women.
The main point here is that you need to identify what’s not quite right before you can fix the problem. The best way to do this is to talk openly to your partner (while being sensitive to their ego) about why it’s not working and how you can improve it. Once you’ve opened this dialogue, you should notice things start to improve!
Achieve Sexual Satisfaction
Sexual satisfaction isn’t something that comes naturally to all couples. You might have to work at it and spend a long time until you’re both 100% happy with your sex life, but it’ll be worth it! Just remember to talk to each other about what you’re feeling, and always visit a doctor if you think there might be a medical problem (such as if you’re experiencing pain from sex).
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